You have heard that is was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love
your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and
pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons
of your Father in heaven… -Matt 5:43-45 (NKJV)
Let’s face it, in a fallen world
crowded with imperfect people there is bound to be drama in one form or
another. Some of it is pretty manageable, but more often than not in this
thing we call “life”, there are going to be plenty of opportunities for others
to push us to our limits. I hesitate to use the phrase “baby mama drama” (or
daddy for you women), but like a friend of mine pointed out…it IS a real issue
in today’s world.
Single and co-parenting naturally
brings in brokenness; and brokenness if left unattended, becomes a breeding
ground for sin. Paul warns us in Eph 4 to “be angry and do not sin…do not give
the devil and opportunity” and Peter tells us to be on alert from our enemy
(1Pet 5:8). No matter how bad the heat may come from the other parent sometimes,
our focus should always remain the same as Jesus’: keep our hearts and minds
focused on God and His statutes. I know that sure is easier said than done, but
as single parents we must come to accept the reality that we cannot control the
other parent and that things aren’t always fair. Our obligation is to Christ
first and then our kids.
The apostle Paul tells us in Eph 6
that our fight is in the spiritual realm─ not against flesh and blood. Anyone
who is not walking under the power and authority of the Holy Spirit is easily
subject to be used like a puppet by Satan. And just like any battle, it must be
fought on neutral grounds. We should never attempt to fight spiritual battles
in our flesh. If we do, we will get beat up over and over and perhaps even make
the situation worse. Instead, zero in on passages such as Paul’s teaching in
2Cor 10:3-5 and hold fast to the fact that we have a Savior who has gone before
us in every possible way so that He can lead, guide, and help us to overcome
the same.
No one knew heartache and betrayal
more than Christ. Yet, the writer of Hebrews tells us that He looked past the
now and towards the glory that God was about to reveal (Heb 12:1-3). Our
mindset should be the same and even though the mercury may be spiking when it
comes to our emotions, we shouldn’t let them lead us astray into even greater
sin. Does that make it any easier when your child’s mom or dad is really pouring
it on? Maybe, maybe not; but hopefully it does give you encouragement. Jesus
explained to us that we WILL have tribulation in this life (John 16:33). God
expects more out of us as believers and as parents, but He in no ways leaves us
to fend for ourselves. If you look back at my previous blog Going
Forth With Praise you will find a perfect example of how keeping our
eyes, minds, and hearts focused on Him and giving praise in the midst of the
storm will ultimately bring us to victory. Whether or not that outcome is the
same as you envisioned I do not know, but I do know that if we remain faithful,
God will cause all things to work for the good of those who love Him (Romans 8:28).
Legendary UCLA coach John Wooden once said, “Failing to prepare is like
preparing to fail”. If we are not trained, prepped, and equipped for when the
tests and trials hit, we will get pulverized every time. That is why our quiet
time with God is so imperative─ for when moments like these arise. The greater
your prayer life and the more Scripture you know AND APPLY on a regular basis,
the better you will endure. Based on some personal experience, here are several
verses that will give you a foundation when adverse situations with your ex (or
whenever) come up:
Isaiah 54:17
Psalm 55:22
Romans 5:3-5,
12:9-21
Proverbs
10:19, 14:29, 15:18
2Tim 2:24
James 1:2-4,
19-20
1Peter
4:12-13, 5:10
Once again, these will only be
effective if done with pure motives, under control of the Holy Spirit, and in
faith that God will hold true to His word. Just like in the gym: if we want to
grow bigger, faster, and stronger, then we need to hit the weights, eat the
right food, and have a sound program. Same thing spiritually: When we encounter
spiritual “weights” (resistance), eat the right food (the Word of God…see
Matthew 4:4), and have a sound program in place (quiet time, church, mentor,
etc…) we are able to grow in our walk with the Lord. Resistance doesn’t
necessarily go away, we just become more conditioned
to handle it. The ultimate goal, of course, should be to model Christ and pray
for those who may wreak havoc in our life. Our obedience now can and will
result in eternal blessings in ours and our children’s lives down the road.
But the salvation of the righteous is
from the Lord; He is their strength in time of trouble. And the Lord shall help
them and deliver them; he shall deliver them from the wicked, and save them,
because they trust in Him. –Psalm 37:39-40
No comments:
Post a Comment