Letting Go of the "Nut" in Your Life

Our next guest blogger for the month of August is Clare De Graff. Clare is the author of The 10 Second Rule, a mentor, and I am grateful to say- a friend as well. You can follow his blog and learn more about the ministry and his book at  http://www.claredegraaf.com/.

When I meet with “driven” men, or those in a tough spot in their marriage or wounded by their “ex”, I’ll often ask them if they have a “nut” they just won’t, or can’t let go of.

I’m told there are tribes who have a unique method of capturing monkeys. It seems they drill a 1 ½” hole in a coconut, drain the milk and dry the meat. A large nut is then dropped through the hole and a short rope or chain is attached. One end is tied to the coconut and the other to a tree.

Soon a monkey will come along, pick up the coconut, shake it and hearing the nut rattling around inside, will reach through the hole for the nut. However, now the monkey’s fist holding the nut is larger than the hole and he can’t remove it.

All he’d have to do to be free is let go of the nut. But, soon the trapper comes along holding a club. The frightened monkey starts running around the palm tree and with each turn shortens the rope until there’s no slack left and he’s clubbed to death.

How stupid we think! But, many of us are gripping a “nut” of our own, and if we don’t let it go, will kill us.

So, what’s your nut?

Your nut may be an addiction, a relationship you know is wrong, or a wound from the past you simply haven’t been able to forgive and forget, or a person in your life who continues to make your life miserable. Your nut may be keeping you up at night, or be killing other important relationships in your life, including your relationship with God.

I know a woman so wounded by her former husband that it has kept her from ever truly trusting a man again. And that nut has even contaminated her own children’s view of men – killing future relationships before they’ve even developed.

I meet with men all the time whose nut is pornography. For others it’s sports, Fantasy Football, or working hard, not just to provide for their family, but so they can buy the next thing they think will make them happy. Many men spend more time every day working out or running than alone with God in Bible study and prayer. Their nut drives them to whatever it is that takes away the pain or makes them feel better about themselves. Sound familiar?

“For a man is a slave to whatever has mastered him.” II Peter 2:19b