When she and I first met, I was not the man I am today. I was fresh off a decade-long run of hardcore drug and alcohol addiction. Having been raised in a home without a full-time dad myself, I found myself scraping and searching for answers to this new role of “fatherhood” that I had just entered into. As if that was not enough, there were multiple battles: legally in a courtroom, and verbally everywhere else. I had lost all sense of identity of who God had created me to be.
Through a series of events that began years earlier, I surrendered my life to Jesus when my daughter was about 8 months old. I was baptized a few months later and began the single father ministry the following year. Life had made a tremendous U-turn for me! When my daughter was almost two years old God gave me the courage and humility to talk on the subject of forgiveness with my daughter’s mom. I told her I forgave her for all the wrongs she had committed against me
and I asked for her forgiveness too. It was NOT well received!
Which brings me to today. Having been a follower of Christ for over 8 years now, I still see some of the consequences of my actions from years ago still being played out, but I also have been given a foundation that cannot be shaken to stand on. 1Peter 4:8 tells us that “love covers a multitude of sins.” If you do a word study on the word “love” in that passage, you will find that it can refer to acts such as “good will”, “benevolence”, or “brotherly love”. To show this sort of love to the other parent helps protect us from a “multitude of sins” in our own lives such as anger, bitterness, and unforgiveness.
I don’t know
where you are with this today, but if you are a follower of Jesus Christ, our
job is not to “keep score” against the other parent (we surely don’t want God
doing that with us!). Instead, we should allow Him to help us die to self so
that we can pour it into others. They may not deserve it, but neither do we.
Yet, the Bible tells us in Romans 5:8, “But God demonstrates His own love
toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” (NASB) When we give Him total access to reign in our
hearts and lives, the greater the fruit we will see revealed. I’m speaking from
experience here and I know you can too. And believe me, even though many of the
trials and frustrations may still linger, the overwhelming joy and peace that
comes through our faith shatters through these temporary struggles and allows
us to be the parents and Christians we were always created to be.
We love, because He first loved us. -1John 4:19 (NASB)Originally posted on March 24, 2015 at http://thesinglemomkc.org/blog/because-he-first-loved-us/
